This book was recommended to me by a few friends, has made it’s way to my social feeds numerous times and mentioned on several of the podcasts I listen to. Most importantly, it was praised by Charlie Munger in one of his recent articles which made me decided to finally give it a listen.
This book has a lot of interesting historical information, a lot of good anecdotes, and is filled with a plethora of good lessons. However, like anything in life, there isn’t a one fits all solution. The author is delivers the philosophy in the book as if it’s only right approach to life. While I will incorporate a few of the lessons I learnt, I don’t think that following all of them on a day-to-day basis would jive with my personality.
I, like most people, am motivated by success but have always hated when my achievements are being praised. I aim to be #1, and have always thought that comparing one’s self against those around me, the “average folk”, is silly. Graduating top of your class, winning a local competition of some sort or being the strongest guy at the gym is nothing to be proud off. It’s a milestone that should be acknowledged, and then it’s time to move on. In my opinion, people should find a handful of people who are the best at something in the word and strive to beat them. Only that handful of individuals are the ones the matter. Though I have no proof, I am quite sure that those people are fueled by self sustaining ambition, not by the praise they receive by people around them.
Dale Carnegie mentions the support that people need when they have failed to achieve something. For me, failure has always been the strongest driving force to work harder. I’ve always hated the small talk or bloated conversation that nothing comes out of as people try to verbally support each other. It’s all talk, with no walk. Failing to solve a problem, being criticized, condemned or losing an argument is what makes me want to go back home and really think about a problem. As a child, getting spanked is what made me obedient rather than playing some clever tricks. A conversation that ends on a good note is often forgotten, it’s the difficult ones that we never forget.
Being friendly and listening to what others have to say is a very good lesson, but only if the other person is saying something mutually beneficial. I’ve found myself in many situations where I waste an hour listening to someone discuss a topic that nothing useful or interesting will come out of. This is extremely particularly frustrating as an impatient person.impatient.
Having studied a lot successful entrepreneurs (Steve Jobs, Elon Musk, Young Bill Gates, etc…), I’ve noticed that most of them are not very empathetic early in their careers. As their klout grew it becomes easier to be empathetic because people are more likely to listen to what they have to say, but early on, direct orders are often a better means than suggestions.
There are counter arguments I can think of to most of the lesson Dale points out. I understand that some people have follow them to a tee and successfully influence people, but it would be unsustainable for me.
Overall, I believe this book is definitely worth reading. There are at least a few lessons anyone can take away, but I would recommend to do so with a grain of salt. I was content with how it was written, but did find that it got a bit repetitive towards the end.